三打白骨精中英文對照搞笑版人物：T唐僧S：孫悟空、E：豬八戒、J：沙僧、B：白骨精、B1：白骨精變成的村姑、B2：白骨精變成的老太婆、B3：白骨精變化成的老頭、N：哪吒第一幕T:Wukong,wherewearenow?悟空：我們現(xiàn)在到哪里了S:Bajie,map!八戒，地圖E:(摸出，遞給S)S:oh，master，look！(湊近T)………（T、S一齊轉(zhuǎn)向E）哦師傅你瞧??！T:Bajie!HowManytimesIhavetoldyoudon'ttakethesepicturesofbeautifulgirlswithyou!八戒，我告訴你多少次啦，不要老是帶美女圖啦！E:Oh,master!Forgiveme(伸手拿回)哦，師傅。原諒我這次吧。T:(縮手)No,IthinkIwilltakethisuntilwegettothewest,bajie,map.沒門，我想就由我暫時保管，直到我們到達(dá)西天，取得真經(jīng)，八戒地圖E:But……T:bajie,nothingislust,lustisnothing!Map?E:(遞)Here.Em……Iamsohungrynow,(坐下來不走了）Icannotmoveanymore,奧師傅我肚子餓扁了，再也走不動了。S:FatPig!你這只豬！E:Monkey,ifyoudaretosaythesetwowordsonceagain,Iwill,Iwill……….死猴子如果你再敢說這倆個字，我就，我就S:Youwillwhat(兇相)?你就要干嘛啊E:(軟禁)Iwillhelpyoucatchfleas(跳蚤).呵呵我就幫你抓虱子??！S:Hm!T:（輕咳）Wukong,Iamhungrytoo，wouldyoubringussomefood?悟空，我也餓了，你能幫我們?nèi)フ尹c吃的嗎？E:Yousee,masterishungry,too!你看，我們師傅也餓了T:Baijie!Don’tforgetwhoatemylastmeal!八戒，不要忘了誰把我上一餐的飯給吃了J:Butmaster,ifamonstercomeswhilebrothermonkeyisaway。whatcanwedo？但是師傅,如果大師兄走了，有妖怪來我們怎么辦T:Em…….Itisaproblem.Wukong,doyouhaveanyidea?這倒是一個問題悟空你有什么辦法嗎？S:Noproblem!(安裝)（B已躲在一旁偷看）E:Thisis…..?這是？S:Electricnet!Ihavelearnttheenergyofelectricityfrommaster’sbooks.SoImadethis.Nomonstercanapproachyouifyoustayinit!這是電網(wǎng)，我從師傅帶的書里學(xué)到的。所以我做了這個，沒有怪獸能夠靠近你如果你待J:Look,(伸食指)howmany?T:Two…..(暈乎乎地)Wukong,gameover!第四幕(這時候B已經(jīng)變成B3)B3:(看到B1,B2尸體)Oh….,mydaughter,mywife!Whodidit?!!(哭喊狂奔過去）S:I’llkillyou,monster!(打)T:（想阻止，未及）You,you.....(險些暈，E,J扶住)Youhavekilledthreelives!S:No,theyarenothumanbeings!Theyarecreatedbymonster!不他們不是人是妖精T:Monster?IthinkYouaretherealmonster!you,go!!you,go!!itisthewrongway,你走錯啦妖精我看你才是真正的妖精，你走，走哪兒來的回哪兒去吧（孫走錯,唐指出）你走錯啦這邊（這里走錯是搞笑部分）S:(悲，離去)（音樂，營造“假”悲傷氣氛）《人鬼情未了》E:Master,brotherMonkeyis.......師傅猴哥真的走啦T:Don'tsaythatguy!B:(出現(xiàn))Ha,ha,ha!(三尸體B1,B2,B3在B招手后“飄”走)T:（驚）Youare......B:Howfoolishyouare,MrTang!(E,J去阻斗，被擊退)B:(抓住T)I'llenjoyyourmeatandblood,ha,ha......S:(悄悄走到B后，打B,B暈)don'ttouchmymaster,T:Wukong?E:Oh,BrotherMonkey!J:ohOurheroisback!第五幕T:I,Ican'tunderstand......Whathappened?我不理解剛才發(fā)生了什么？S:Master,yourIQneedsincreasing!Thismonsterchangeditsappearanceintothreeshapesinordertocheatyou!師傅，你的智商堪憂啊，這個怪獸改變了外表三次目的是為了吃你。T:How,howdidyoufindout?你怎么知道的S:(沉默).......Monkey'sintuition(直覺)猴子的直覺N:Iamcoming.whereistheanimal?S;Ah......youaretoolate,哪吒(對T)I'vecalledthepolice.對哪吒說，你已經(jīng)來的太晚了。哪吒說，我報警了。N:heihei(搖醒B)Youareunderarrest.(出示證件)YouhavetherighttoremainsilentIfyougiveuptheright,anythingyouwillsaycanandwillbeagainstyouinacourtoflaw!letusgo

(帶走白骨精B)嘿嘿你被捕了，你現(xiàn)在可以保持沉默，你現(xiàn)在所說的每一句話將

來都可能成為呈堂證供，走吧！T:Wukong(S不理T)。Iadmitmymistakethistime(S仍不理)。I'msorry(小聲)S:What?T:I'msorry.S:Icannothearclearly.?T:I......am......