Continuationwriting讀后續(xù)寫練習(xí)——福利院孩子看望善良奶奶1原文分析contents續(xù)寫原文構(gòu)思情節(jié)語言表達(dá)參考范文2Part1續(xù)寫原文34續(xù)寫原文EverySunday,GrandmaandIwalkedtotheChildren’shomeafewblocksawayfromourhouse.Grandmaalwaysbringsahome-madecaketothesechildren,whoareofdifferentnationalitiesandages.Somearerefugees（難民）whocannottalkinEnglish,someareevendisabled.FirstwevisitJohn,whoisfromBrazil.Icallhim“Footballgenius”.Heplaysfootballsowellthatheorganizedafootballteamtohelpotherkidsdevelopfootballskills,suchaspassingandballcontrol.Everytimewereachedtheplayground,wesawagroupofsweatykidsrunningaroundafieldwithbrightsmiles.NextwevisitDaisy.Icallher“Thesinger”becauseshehasagreatgiftforsinging.Shelovestosingsongsforus.Wherevershestays,hersoftandsweetvoicefillstheair.ThenwevisitDavid.Icallhim“Prince（王子）Joke”.Hecandotalkshow,crosstalk（相聲）,telljokes.Sometimeshelaughsloudlywhiletellingjokes,wecouldseehislegsshakingupanddown,hisfaceturningred.GrandmaandIcan’thelplaughingalongwithhim.5續(xù)寫原文EverySunday,GrandmaandIwalkedtotheChildren’shomeafewblocksOneday,Grandmafellillandhadtostayinbed.Shewasinalowspiritandcouldn’tmove.Sundaycame.Grandmaputmyhandintoherhandandtoldme“Rosegiven,fragrance（芳香）inhand.”Iunderstoodwhatshemeant,Iboughtacakefromshopandwenttochildren’shome.Everyonewashappytoseeme.Theyweredisappointedwhentheydidn’tseegrandma.Knowinggrandmawassick,theyweresad.Theyprayedtogetherforgrandma’srecovery.Afterawhile,Isaidgoodbyetoeveryone.Aweeklater,grandmawasstilllyinginbed.Shecouldnotwalkorspeak,whatshecoulddowasdrinksomemilk.Ibeggedhertogotohospital.Sheshookherhead.IhidmyselfunderthebigtreeinouryardsoGrandmawouldn’tseetearsonmycheeks.Part2原文分析67原文分析when記敘文要素whowherewhatwhyhow作者的奶奶很有愛心，經(jīng)常看望福利院的孩子們，了解孩子們的愛好特長。一天奶奶生病了，依舊牽掛著孩子們，讓作者去探望孩子們。作者把奶奶生病的消息告訴給了福利院的孩子。奶奶的病情加重，還喪失了信心，不肯去醫(yī)院。作者焦慮萬分。MainideaPart3構(gòu)思情節(jié)89構(gòu)思情節(jié)理解paragraph1所給句：Suddenly,thedoorbellrang（突然，門鈴響了）.前文結(jié)尾，奶奶病重，情緒低落，拒不就醫(yī)，由首句中的Suddenly可知，有了轉(zhuǎn)機(jī)?？梢詁ellring為突破口，運(yùn)用記敘文的六要素構(gòu)思情節(jié)：門鈴響了，是誰來看望奶奶來了？帶著這個(gè)問題，來構(gòu)思第一個(gè)續(xù)寫段落。誰（who）來看望奶奶？帶來了什么（what）？為什么（why）要來探望？如何（how）進(jìn)行探望的？奶奶的感受如何（how）？根據(jù)這一系列的問題，迅速構(gòu)思情節(jié)并組織語言。10構(gòu)思情節(jié)理解續(xù)寫的Paragraph2首句：Thatevening,grandmacalledmeinherbedroom（那天晚上，奶奶把我叫到她的臥室）.思考：奶奶叫我進(jìn)來做什么,先在頭腦中構(gòu)思各種可能性：（1）Grandmawantstogotohospital.（2）Grandmawashungry,sheneedstoeatsomething.（3）GrandmawantstogotoChildren’shome.Part4語言表達(dá)1112語言表達(dá)1.蒼白的臉上浮現(xiàn)出困惑的表情。Aconfusedlookappearedonherpaleface.2.臉上露出了滿足的微笑。Asatisfiedsmileflashedonherface.3.眼里閃現(xiàn)著喜悅的光芒。Hereyeswereshiningwithjoy.4.孩子們的微笑閃現(xiàn)在她的腦海里。Children’ssmilesflashedthroughhermind.5.一個(gè)用水果裝飾的好看的心形蛋糕anice-lookingcakedecoratedwithfruitsintheshapeofheart13語言表達(dá)6.一張色彩鮮艷的照片abright-coloredpicture7.一大碗粥abigbowlofporridge8.她掙扎著站起來。Shestruggletoherfeet.9.聚集起她所有的體力gatherallherstrength10.忍住眼淚holdbacktears14語言表達(dá)15語言表達(dá)16.很明顯，她渴望盡快恢復(fù)，以便去看望那些可愛的孩子。Evidently,shewaseagertorecoversoontovisitthelovelykids.17.奔向他的懷抱throwherselfintohisarms18.淚眼朦朧中，他們擁抱到一起。Withtearyeyes，theyhuggedtogether.19.迫不及待地跟她分享喜悅的消息cantwaittosharetheexcitingnewswithher20.喜悅的淚水沖出了她的眼眶happytearswelledupinhereyesPart5參考范文1617參考范文Suddenly,thedoorbellrang.Grandmaopenedhereyesandsatup.Aconfusedlookappearedonherpaleface.Suddenly,aloudlaughtercameintomyears.“ItsDavid,theJokePrince.”Ishouted.“Wemissyou.”Davidrushedtograndmawithadelicatecakeinhishands.Itwasanice-lookingcakedecoratedwithfruitsintheshapeofheart.“Thecakeismadebyallchildreninthenurseryhome.”Davidsaidandswitchedontherecorder,asweetvoicefilledtheair.ItwasasongsungbyDaisy.Magically,hetookoutapicture.Inthepicture,grandmawaswatchingJohns’footballteamplayingfootball.18參考范文Thatevening,grandmacalledmeinherbedroom.Shesaidshewashungry.Shedrankabigbowlofporridgeandtastedabitofcake.Asatisfiedsmileflashedonherface.Hereyeswereshiningwithjoy.Withtearsinhereyes,shehuggedtherecorderandpictureintoherarms.Shetoldmeshewouldgo