WILLIAM:Um,CanIhelpyouatall?

ANNA:No,thanks.I'lljustlookaround.

WILLIAM:Fine.

WILLIAM:Uh,thatbook'sreallynotgreat.Justincase,youknow,browsingturnedtobuying.You'dbewastingyourmoney.Butifit'sTurkeyyou'reinterestedin,um,thisone,ontheotherhand,isverygood.Um,IthinkthemanwhowroteithasactuallybeentoTurkey,whichhelps.Um,there'salsoaveryamusingincidentwithakebab,um,whichisoneofmanyamusingincidents.

ANNA:Thanks.I'llthinkaboutit.

WILLIAM:Or,inthebiggerhardbackvariety,there's..I'msorry.Canyoujustgivemeasecond?

W:Oh!Shit!

W:Bugger!

A:Oh,myGod!

W:I'msosorry.I'msosorry.Here.Letme...

A:Getyourhandsoff!

W:I'mreallysorry.I...Ilivejustoverthestreet.Ihave,um,waterandsoap.Youcangetcleanedup.

A:No,thankyou.Ijustneedtogetmycarback.

W:Ialsohaveaphone.I'mconfidentthatinfiveminuteswecouldhaveyouspick-and-spanandbackonthestreetagain.Inthenon-prostitutesense,obviously.

A:Allright.Well..whatdoyoumean,'justoverthestreet'?Giveittomeinyards.

W:Uh,18yards.That'smyhousetherewiththebluefrontdoor.

W:Comeonin.I'lljust...I'lljust...Um,right.Right.Comein.It's,um,notquiteastidyasitnormallyis,Ifear.But,um..thebathroom'sonthetopfloor.Andthetelephone'sjust..justuphere.Here.Let..Letme,um..Um,roundthecorner.Straighton--straightonup.Bugger.

W:Wouldyoulikeacupofteabeforeyougo?

A:No.

W:Coffee?

A:No.

W:Orangejuice?Probablynot.Um,somethingelsecold--coke,water,somedisgustingsugarydrinkpretendingtohavesomethingtodowithfruitsoftheforest?

A:No.

W:Wouldyoulikesomethingtoeat?Um,somethingtonibble?Um,apricots,soakedinhoney?Quitewhy,nooneknows,

W:Listen,Iappreciatethat.Absolutely.Sowhatisthat,afilmyou'redoing?

A:Um,startinL.A.OnTuesday.

W:Wouldyoulikemetotakeyouthroughyourlines?

A:Wouldyou?Causeit'salltalk,talk,talk.

W:Handitover.

A:Ican'tbelieveyouhavethatpicture.

W:YoulikeChagall?

A:Ido.Itfeelslikehowloveshouldbe..floatingthroughadarkbluesky.

W:Withagoat,playingaviolin.

A:Well,yes.Happinessisn'thappinesswithoutaviolin-playinggoat.

A:Youhavebigfeet.

W:Yes.Yes,alwayshavehad.

A:Youknowwhattheysayaboutmenwithbigfeet.

W:No,what'sthat?

A:Uh,bigfeet,largeshoes.

A:Hello.Youdisappeared.

W:Yeah,yeah.Ihadtoleave.Ididn'twanttodisturb.

A:Howhaveyoubeen?

W:Fine,fine.Everythingmuchthesame.Whentheychangethelaw,SpikeandIwillmarryimmediately.Whereasyou,I'vewatchedinwonder.Awards,glory.

A:oh,no.It's..It'sallnonsense,believeme.I'dnoideahowmuchnonsenseitwas,butnonsenseitallis.Well,yesterdaywasourlastdayoffilming,soI'mleaving.But,um..Ibroughtthisforyoufromhome,soIthoughtI'dgiveittoyou.

W:thankyou.ShallI..

A:Oh,no,don'topenitnow.I'llbeembarrassed.

W:Well,thankyou.Idon'tknowwhatit'sfor,butthanksanyway.

A:Actually,Ihaditinmyapartment,andIthoughtyou'd..Butwhenitcametoit,Ididn'tknowhowtocallhavingbehavedsobadly.Twice.Soit'sjustbeensittinginthehotel.ThenyoucameandIfigured..Thethingis..Thethingis..

W:What?Whatisthething?Don'teventhinkaboutit.Goawayimmediately.Goaway.Youweresaying?

A:Yes.Ihavetogoawaytoday,butIwonderedifIdidn'twhetheryoumightletmeseeyoualittle,oralot,maybe.

Seeifyoucouldlikemeagain?

W:ButyesterdaythatactoraskedwhoIwas,andyoujustdismissedmeoutofhand.Iheard.Youhadamicrophone.Ihadheadphones.

A:YouexpectmetotellthetruthaboutmylifetothemostindiscreetmaninEngland?

A:There'salwaysapausewhenthejurygoesouttoconsidertheirverdict.

W:Anna,look,um..I'mafairlylevelheadedbloke,notofteninandoutoflove.But,uh,..CanIjustsaynotoyourkindrequestand,uh,leaveitatthat？

A:Yes.Fine.Ofcourse.I..Ofcourse.I'lljustbegoing,then.Itwasnicetoseeyou.

W:Thethingis,withyouI'minrealdanger.Itseemslikeaperfectsituationapartfromthatfoultemperofyours,butmyrelativelyinexperiencedheartwould,Ifear,notrecover,uh,ifIwasonceagaincastaside,asIwouldabsolutelyexpecttobe.Therearejusttoomanypicturesofyou,toomanyfilms.You'dgoandI'dbe,uh,wellbuggered,basically.

A:Thatreallyisarealno,isn'tit?

W:IliveinNottingHill.YouliveinBeverlyHills.Everyoneintheworldknowswh